Facing Fears: Facts are not Fatal

“You’ve trained me with the weapons of warfare-worship; now I’ll descend into battle with power to chase and conquer my foes. You empower me for victory with your wrap-around presence. Your power within makes me strong to subdue, and by stooping down in gentleness you strengthened me and made me great!”

‭‭Psalms‬ ‭18:34-35‬ ‭TPT‬‬

After five years of making Chicago my home, I decided to take the bold step to go and get my migraines checked. [I’ve dealt with migraines since I was a kid, so it wasn’t really a new thing to do]

—“We need to check your cervix and run a pap smears test so we are sure you don’t have cancer cells.”

This was my doctor’s response after a 15-minute questionnaire and family health background.

-“I am coming for you”...Petrified in 3, 2, 1!

Have you ever been in a horror movie? Don’t answer, it’s rhetorical. This scene made me feel like I was in a horror movie. I could legit hear a Freddy Crouger voice whispering, “I am coming for you” and by this I mean Cancer.

The Fear Prayer

Have you ever done the Lord’s Prayer? Well, this one felt more like the fear prayer; I let the door wide open for fear to come into mind, my heart and dominate my behavior.

Let me give you some background here: I lost both of my grandparents from cancer; I almost lost my mom from breast cancer surgery two years ago, and my nineteen-year-old sister got ovarian cysts surgery less than a month ago...do you see my justified fear here?
My fear of losing family members is very real, but as I was recalling my prayer at the beginning of the year, I remembered I asked him for Freedom in every area of my life.

—“To overcome fear you have to face it”

The more I keep telling people that prayers DO work, the more I keep forgetting that this applies to me, too: I asked and declared a year of freedom and I should have known better than giants and mountains were coming my way. But I’m not going to lie to you here, the first week I panicked, I cried a lot, felt defeated, and almost depressed—Fear was having a party at Lucia’s house.

Every day I had two options; to believe God was good and praise him or to be miserable, dawn and sad. It was SO hard for me, and probably one of the worst fears I’ve ever faced. But, if I can be honest with you in one thing is that somehow I knew God was in control. He showed up through friends, my church community, my bosses, my family—even when I had lost hope, they had hope for me; when I couldn’t find words to pray; people were reaching out to pray for me; when I had no desire of being in community he sent people my way to remind me that we are stronger together.

Interlude-Praise

Five days ago, I had my test results back and they were negative! God’s word is unfailing. Even though I totally felt like my behavior and faith fell short of the role I play as her daughter, this tested me, refined me and left me stronger—still rooted...deeply rooted in Him.

The hurricane ”C” almost drowned me in fear and left me terrorized...but God and his word came through! I can't stop but to ponder the question: Are we proclaiming Victory or Fear? I wonder how different our approach to storms would be if we all have the Psalm 18 attitude? 

We are made of flesh, life is different for everyone, and every person goes through unique experiences-I get it- but one thing pierces through them all--God is loyal.

Prayer of the Week

Father, whether I’m in my highs or in my lows, would you give me your strength and courage? Would you increase my faith beyond my sight? I pray for your perfect love to cast away all my fears. In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen.